eShoppers get the hots for backless thong

VPL and VTL eliminated. Praise be to the net

By Lester Haines • Get more from this author

Posted in Bootnotes, 28th July 2005 15:13 GMT

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In what must be the only story ever to appear on El Reg which can challenge IT-driven material for the sheer weight of TLAs (three-letter acronyms) available to the abbreviation-hungry hack (AHH), UK online lingerie and sex accessory outfit Lovehoney (adult products, natch) has at a stroke eliminated the nightmare of VPL and indeed VTL.

Older readers will remember how women's underwear manufacturers (WUM) battled for years against the scourge of visible panty line - guaranteed to result in ridicule and social exclusion (RSE). Later came the thong, with its own associated visible thong line trauma (TLT)...

The solution? Simple: remove the back of the thong altogether and voila! - backless lingerie for trauma-free partygoing (TFP).

And here's why:

Unprecedented comfort - unlike thongs, Backless Lingerie doesn't ride, wedge or shift. Their soft straps sit snugly below your buttocks, enabling complete freedom. Show your best side at its best - in total comfort.

Yup, the "Backless Lingerie Invisible Thong" (BLIT) is going down a storm with female eShoppers, so much so that it has sold out completely at Lovehoney.

Do not depair, though, we at Vulture Central have the perfect interim solution (PIS): just send us the £9.99 you would have spent on a BLIT and we'll send you absolutely nothing, which will eliminate all trace of VPL and VTL no matter what you wear - guaranteed. ®